April 6, 2026
Parent engagement might start with a flyer, a meeting time, or a one‑off program—but to be successful, trusting relationships must be earned and built together. That was the key takeaway from Common Ground Health–Rochester RHIO Parent Engagement Specialist Erick Stephens, who presented at the Early Childhood Summit on March 26 at the Wayne‑Finger Lakes Board of Cooperative Educational Services (BOCES). His session examined the habits that build—or break—that trust and showed how Healthi Kids embeds parents in everything from agenda setting to advocacy.
Stephens described a community table where parents aren’t guests—they’re co‑authors. He talked about how the Healthi Kids change agenda was written with parents, not for them, and that parent leaders sit at scores of decision‑making tables convened by Healthi Kids across the region. Throughout, Stephens emphasized transparency, consistency, and respect—and a practical, human approach to partnership built on shared decision‑making and real opportunities for parents to lead.
He underscored that trust is earned in the unglamorous minutes: calling back, showing up to their events, sharing updates before anyone has to ask, and giving parents a real say in the work.
Trust also deepens when we tell the truth about what families experience in schools.
Stephens named what many feel: “PTSD—post‑traumatic school disorder,” referring to the betrayal parents can feel from experiences that devalue their time and ability to co-create solutions. He also named his own growth, acknowledging times he carried bias into conversations with parents and how he’s worked to unlearn it through listening before advising, asking before answering, and creating space for parents to define success on their terms.
“I loved that he was honest and shared the hard part of his job. It shows that he is a humble leader,” said Kylie Becker, a special needs consultant serving Monroe, Wayne, and Livingston counties.
Building trust changed everything with one parent in particular, Jamie. In 2024, the Healthi Kids team brought Jamie to a conference in California. “She felt like a professional. She felt validated. It was beautiful.”
Instead of being consulted late in the process, Jamie was brought in from the start—asked what success would look like for her child and for herself, and what would make the school relationship feel trustworthy. Given space, respect, and real decision‑making power, Jamie blossomed. She didn’t just attend meetings; she shaped them. She didn’t just react to plans; she co‑created them. The difference showed up in her confidence, her advocacy, and ultimately, in better support for her child.
“It was also a reminder to go directly to the source,” Becker continued.
That partnership extended to public storytelling: “Jamie has been on podcasts with me, the radio, TV, and sharing her journey of evolving and learning about infant and early childhood mental health.”
For Ella Isaac, a master’s student in public health interning with Healthi Kids, the session sparked a shift in practice. “I have already overlooked giving parents a voice they deserve,” she said, recognizing she can take more initiative when bringing parents to the table.
Another way Stephens’ team shows they value parent expertise is by compensating it.
“We compensate our parents at a rate of $35 per hour for every meeting that they come to,” said Stephens, who acknowledged that while funding could be difficult there are local funders who are looking to invest in supporting this type of community support.
Payment covers the full scope of the work. “When they table, they get paid. That includes the prep time, Zoom practice, and driving time.” As Stephens put it, if staff are paid to be at a meeting, parents should be, too. “I want all their knowledge and all their information about their community, but then I’m just going to give them a thank you and a bagel?”
For families, even $300–$400 a month can mean gas or groceries—and, just as importantly, it signals that parents are trusted experts. Stephens’ longer‑term goal: ensure parents leave with résumé‑ready language that creates pathways to paid roles.
Stephens’ message is simple, yet transformative: design with parents, not for them. That means centering parent voice from the start, compensating their expertise, and doing the small, consistent things that prove trust over time. When all that comes together, parents don’t just feel heard—they lead—and trust, belonging, and outcomes grow together.